‘Sabira’: my mother’s name. It means patient/tolerant. A simple, ordinary woman like any other. Average in almost everything; looks, education and ambition. But one thing that she has in abundance, beyond thinking, is patience: true to her name. And forgiveness.
She got married at a tender age of 18 and had to leave her studies incomplete. She was definitely not happy about it. Marriage turned her life upside down in totality. From Pakistan to India. From a nuclear family to a big joint family. From a big house to a match box. From a loving father to an aggressive husband. Hoof!! I can’t even begin to imagine what she must have gone through and how she adjusted herself through this cyclone of changes.
In spite of all other things being average about her, the most special characteristic she possesses, which I’m trying to cultivate in me; is her big heart filled with patience and forgiveness. These two noble qualities sailed her boat in the tempest of life and now each and every family member adores and respects her, for her struggles and sacrifices.
Despite all the responsibilities and burdens of being a housewife, she nurtured us with the best of manners and values. Not once did she allow her negative circumstances to influence us. On the contrary she would always say,
“We need to learn from our mishaps and become stronger to face bigger challenges of life.”
Even in the most dreary situations she is always calm and composed. She has immense faith in God and never fails to encourage us to do the same.
“God is great. Don’t worry, he will show you such a beautiful solution, which you wouldn’t have ever thought of.”
Just remembered a quote that aptly suits her like hand and glove:
“Moms are like buttons…..they hold everything together.”
Through this article, I take this opportunity to thank my darling mom profusely for everything she is to me and for all that I have learnt from her. The following poem is dedicated to her. I wrote it when I was fifteen years old. Just a tiny gesture of what I feel she is all about.
Here I am, sitting beside a candle light,
The twilight has gone, and here lies the night.
The candle is burning, spreading brightness all around,
She’s like a mother, the secret I’ve just found.
A candle gives light, while she’s burning,
A mother loves and cares, while she’s still struggling.
A candle keeps the light near and darkness away,
A mother wipes tears and listens to what you have to say.
Though it reduces in size, the candle continues to give light,
The mother faces many hurdles, but tries to bring you up right.
They both struggle and brighten our lives till the last,
Remember this truth and tie it in your heart steady fast.
~ Shamim Merchant