In calendar ,today is Father’s Day.. For me my birthday is my Father’ Day.My first cry made him smile.My first twinkle of lashes brought tears in his Eyes. My blabbers like MA MA PA PA Brought shine to his eyes.While toddling ,he copied me and became my CO toddler.With the passage of time , whatever changes ~physical ,emotional ,social I put on… he witnessed me with the feeling of a revival of his childhood through me .He hold my hands and led me to school .He used to see me ,hiding behind class windows ,as to how I look among other children .When I entered my youth with innumberable dreams ,wishes, desires .He began to come late from office doing overtime for extra income to meet my growth .
He ever wished I should be more educated ,better placed professional with all the amenities he knew about but could not afford for me . I had always seen dry tears behind his smile . He always put my needs and wants ahead of his own .He tried diligently to become an ideal father .I argued , I belittled ,I compared ,I admonished him for having not made the best use of opportunities and left behind others of fathers .He looked at me staring straight in my eyes ,in silent words, telling whatever I had ,I invested in you .You are my best achievement ,you are my success in life .I could not get along with his thinking ideology ~behavior and I started making distance which ultimately took me too far and too divergent from him . I married with my choice disregarding him .I separated .I sent money to him but he refused to accept stating he had enough sources to live up to his standard .He asked me to save that money for modern and elite upbringing of my children .He is no more ….Now his words ,behavior ,ideology resonates ….I have tears in my eyes ..He was a great father of unworthy son …PA PA …you are my unsung hero…
You have thrown me in the sky with your two wide open hands to hold me before I fall …you have picked me up …brushed off ..and encouraged me to try again ..No love can exceed or match your love for me …My thousands of words to God will never bring you back ,neither stream of my tears can bring you back..You have broken our hearts and left precious memories ….I never want your memories PA PA ..I want you ….when I come to you PA PA ..please do not reject me …I want your shoulder to cry ….your hands to wipe my tears and embrace me …
Today is Father’s Day …
PA PA ….I Miss you a lot….PA PA …
~ Rajnikant Raval
